Tuesday, November 24, 2009

We're going to eat our new mascot.

Bonjour, and thanks for tuning in on Thanksgiving! This is the first time I may feel remorse about eating such an ugly bird, as a turkey is technically both Trip and my own current employer.


Let me make yet another announcement for Trip: he turned in the final revisions of his master's thesis just last week, and it is completely out of his hair for the rest of his (and my) life. Way to go, Trip and see you later Billy Panther and the associated terrible Financial Aid office at EIU!




Now for story time:

A few weeks ago, we thought we'd like to attend a highly-acclaimed beer tasting and chili cook-off at the local pumpkin patch, Sinkland Farms. It cost 5$ at the door and a further 10$ to get into the beer garden. We left the house hungry, assuming that we would get some chili. After paying our admission, we perused the yumblicious-smelling chili pit to find that they were completely out of chili, which we just paid for. Uh, thanks for the notice? We had to buy food, leaving us no money to taste beer. The bluegrass band was also good, for the two songs they played. Bummer. The main reason for this seeming complaint is not to rant at all, but rather to lighten your mood, I promise. Keep reading, but in the mean time, this picture of the bluegrass band and their weird chandelier will keep you story-satiated.







While we were cruising around the place, a little miffed, I noticed a gathering of miniature horses tied to a trailer. They were being used for giving little kids rides around in a cart. I began petting one as if it were Woodford or some other retarded puppy, roughing it up a bit. The pony disapproved. I felt a little ashamed of myself, a horsewoman treating an equine this way. I knelt down to it's level to make amends and give it a pat on the shoulder and a scratch on it's whithers. No sooner had I landed on my knee did the wretched little thing bite, yes, BITE, my face. Right on the forehead! Trip and I were completely taken aback, speechless with dropped jaws. When they reconnected with our skulls, only laughter came out of them. It didn't do any damage, left a small pink mark for a couple hours, but a bloody, gaping hole in my pride. Only because I think the owner lady saw it and giggled.







On a much more pumped note, Trip and I both had a shot last week. No, not the kind of shots you're thinking of, H1N1 shots! Surely someone has beef with this, but I don't care. I don't have health insurance so I'd rather NOT die of swine flu now, when I am awesome, and stand in line at the cancer clinic with you shot-nazis 40 years later and say "Well at least I didn't get the swine flu." Even Woodford shows support for the anti-swine, although he thinks it sounds delicious.






The second week Trip and I graced Blacksburg with our presence, we stopped at a very small, run-down-ish cake and donut shop. Every SINGLE weekend since, we have indulged ourselves at Carol Lee Donuts. We get two donuts and two small coffees for 3$. The donuts are the best donuts I can remember on this earth, and the coffee is fresh-brewed; delicious combo!






Usually we immediately head for the day's hiking destination, all fired up on coffee and ready to burn off the 73830 calories in one donut. I swear they're so delciously fried they almost crunch a little upon biting them. The good crunch! I always get a chocolate one with Hokie sprinkles. Trip gets filled ones, but I usually offer to drive when he's eating. I do remember a story of a man by the name of Krenz involving a donut and a T-bone, and not the steak...

But anyway, we hiked around in Mountain Lake Park one day after eating donuts. Here is the view. You must be getting a little bored of these mountain-top views. Maybe I'll have to start spelunking to show some cooler pictures...












Oh, and Trip got the garden tilled up! My good horseback riding friend, Greg, let us borrow his big tiller a couple weekends ago. This past weekend, we revisited him to get a truck load of aged horse manure; black gold! Now our garden is really underway. Here are some pictures of what it looked like before and after the tilling. There are no pictures of the garden after the manure. Imagine the road apples you have seen left behind after prom night on the riverfront in Peoria, and multiply that by 400. In my backyard. Woodford's Thanksgiving feast came early.









Trip must have liked shoveling horse crap so much that he accepted Greg's inquiry to join us on an up-and-coming Christmas parade as the poop-scooper behind the horses Greg, me, and company will be astride. Its my first parade on a horse, but not Trip's first time shoveling a Natalie-related line of crap.

The aforementioned Greg also shot, gutted, and cut up a deer for Trip and I. This is how it arrived to me, and to the butcher down the road. Looks gross but I can't wait for summer sausage and venison stew!







The Suzy Homemaker in me is making more and more headway all the time. Listen to this; I sewed for an entire evening the other day. Yikes! A while ago Woodford "accentuated" my quilt. He must think less is more, as he ate it in strips. I cut up an old pair of underwear and patched it up. This is the final product. Oh and don't worry about the underwear, they were too small for my butt.






Just yesterday I made the executive decision that we will listen to Christmas music on alternating evenings of NPR hearings. Delilah's radio station is playing it constantly now, and Trip is overjoyed beyond words. He can only shake his head in sheer happiness! This must be how he feels inside:






Also good news of recent; I am trying out a series of bread recipes I found in Mother Earth News. They say I can make good bread in five minutes a day, and I am going to give it a try. I included a photo documentary. If you know me at all, you know that any product containing yeast is what makes my explode, and I had to eat a little bit of the rising dough. Basically we're mixin' up breadstuffs and rockin' around a radio-wave Christmas tree.











After the bread was completed, it wasn't that great. It was really pretty, but not very flavorful (read on for a possible reason why this could have happened...). I'm still going to try making pecan cinnamon rolls out of the master dough recipe, and see if Mom and Dad will let me make them on Christmas morning. Yum!

Also worth a mention: This evening Trip and I were going to make deep-fried venison fillets for din-din, and Trip put on the canola/vegetable oil blend (unbeknownst to me) at "High" on the electric stove. I was happily prepping my bread dough for the oven, when I looked over to see a LOT of stinky white stuff rising from the pan. Bringing this to his attention, I ran upstairs to nab the screaming carbon monoxide detector off the wall while the house filled with a lung-burning white smoke. I let the dog and cat out behind me while he yelled about the pan attached to his arm that was en fuego. I'll spare the exact phrases. He ran to the driveway and dropped the burning utensil as it exploded with flames, kind of like a Charlie's Angels scene.

After taking a stroll through the hayfield to ensure we could still breathe correctly, we decided we needed to open some windows in the poor little house if we were ever going to step foot in there again. It smelled terrible! I called dibs on the upstairs, which was the worst. Inhaling HUGE breaths behind our coats, we ran into the house. My eyes burned when I hit the stairs, and by the time I reached the windows they were pouring tears as if John Lennon/Michael Jackson died this morning.

Needless to say, we went out for dinner. Upon our return (with Icehouse, as we needed it) the house was safe to enter, but pretty saturated with burnt oil stench. I baked my bread (two hours after it was supposed to be in the oven...) and Trip pan-fried the previously breaded venison fillets that he so valliantly made a separate entrance to refrigerate prior to our departure. So here you are, Dad. They were pretty good.









Happy Thanksgiving to Illinois from Southern Appalachia. We miss you. We love you.

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Dear Jack Frost, please consider getting lost until we have heating oil.

This morning I arose to a freshly frosted field behind our little leaky farmhouse. To my knowledge, this is the first. It was 30 degrees, chilly! Still no oil in the tank, but we do just fine with our space heaters (so far).



Anyway, down to the nitty gritty; some recent events. A couple weekends ago, we wanted to act like we were camping, without paying money to camp. We had recently cleared a fair amount of brush, so we decided to make our own little bonfire. Success! Trip was so excited that he bought us a sixer of decent beer, which I happily participated in the disposal of. We also set up his tent in the back yard and slept outside. It was really chilly out there, I think it got down to 38 that night. We had the strings of our mummy bags drawn as tight as we could. I had a blanket inside mine, but it didn't help much. Poor Woodford didn't get a sleeping bag, he just slept on my legs. Hmf.






Here you can see why I should never have children.





If you heard a rumor going around about my job getting steroids, you heard right. Currently I work ~20 hours/week (at the bug job), and they asked me if I would start working 40 in January. This girl is going on maternity leave for a few months and they need some help in the lab. They also hinted at the strong possibility that there may be a permanent full-time position opening soon. So, I think I might take it. Its a very complex situation that twirls around in my head every day. I think; should I go to school or work? Well, the whole point of going to school is to get a teaching degree, which is a job I can take anywhere with me later. However, if I ended up getting a full-time job at Virginia Tech, then I could slowly take classes (1 free one per semester if you're salaried staff) to get my degree over the course of a few years. Then, if I really wanted to go somewhere, I'd be good to go. Or, if I wanted, I could stay at Virginia Tech and move up in the ranks with fellow beetle-rearing specialists. It sounds win-win to me.


Last weekend I made a very poor decision. My horseback riding friend, Greg, asked if I'd like to join him on a trip to the horse auction in Mt Airy, North Carolina with an empty trailer and a (his) pocket o'money in tow. Of course, I accepted. I only had a few dollars cash on me, enough to buy a grilled cheese and sweet tea for dinner. Upon arrival, we perused the aisles of the barn. He was looking for a Tennessee Walker gelding, I was looking for something pretty to make my "stable-shopping" worthwhile. He wasn't impressed with anything he was seeing, and I wasn't either, really.
So in the last leg of our loop, we passed by this dim corner of stalls containing horses at the bottom of the barrel. No other people were in this corner, it was pretty depressing. I passed by this one stall, and a full black mane got my attention. I peered inside to find a scared, thin, narrow-bodied horse with a beautiful color and markings. He stared at me through his dense forelock, eyes wide, notrils flaring and plastered himself against the wall of his stall, trembling. I moaned, "Oh Greg, I found one." My throat swelled, and eyes hazy. He waddled over, and in his southern accent "Oh that thing? That'd be like sittin' on a fence rail!" Seeing that I was about in a puddle, he said "Well go on in."
I entered the stall, the horse would have climbed the wall if he wasn't tied to it. With some low murmuring, eyes averted to his shoulder, and a slow indirect path over to him, I let him look me over. Once he visibly relaxed, I slowly lifted my arm to his left shoulder, he anticipated my touch by nearly vibrating his skin. Once I felt him, he relaxed, let me rub him all over. He was afraid, but he didn't want to be that way.
I'm not going into details, as I have enough already. After a very stressful couple hours of waiting, and Greg's numerous offers to loan me money and a pasture, he entered the ring. I could see why he was so afraid, watching the man on top of him. He was a purebred Paso Fino, and sold for 95$. I snapped a couple pictures with my phone.











Again mentioning Trip's cousin, Justin, he asked Trip to be his best man in the wedding. Exciting news, looks like we'll be back to Illinois a few times next year! Plus, Trip will have a new cousin-in-law when its all said and done, alright Natalie!

Speaking of the bite-sized man, he and I have been talking of Christmas lately. We are actually both excited to go home and spend the flu season with our families! We will also take gifts in the form of 100$ bills and a shiny VW Golf (just surprise me with the color). Thank you in advance.



And I'll leave you with another long-winded story, as the oven is telling me to take the pumpkin pie out of it:

Today I did something I've not done in some time; I raced the setting sun. With gusto!
Back in the days of McNaughton Park galavanting greatness, I wanted nothing more than to be inside the forest for every moment of sun. I would run until my quads begged for mercy, clutch my handlebars like prayer sticks while screaming down hills like cliffsides, and listen to the earth throb under my ambling mount's hooves. The sun set early in the forest, and as soon as her bottom would graze the crown of the tallest sycamore tree, the checkered flag dropped; Go! It taunted me like a squirrel on a tree trunk waving it's tail just six inches above the bouncing dog's highest attempts. I'd run or pedal as hard as I could, cursing my body for its reluctant pace, or hiss my steed into a more lively gait.
So long as I reached my destination before her last beams headed west for the night, I won. When I accepted her challenge, I never lost, I'd just ask to play again tomorrow.
Tonight, atop my 3-speed cruiser, I lost. There are more hills in Virginia than McNaughton.